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Saturday, November 6, 2010

How To End A Relationship

Question: I just found out that my live in boyfriend of 17 years is cheating on me. What is the best way for me to end this relationship.

Click on comments to read Laura's advice.


Eleventh Hour LLC said...

Dear Marlene,
It is a very difficult time when you find out your partner has been unfaithful. It sounds like you have made your mind up to end the relationship. I think the most important part of how you end this is that you can maintain your dignity and self-worth. Maybe something like this, "I'm so disappointed that things turned out this way, I loved you faithfully for 17 years and I see that our time together must now end. I can not stay with you after what has happened and it hurts me tremendously, but I will be moving on now. I can not stay in this relationship because you have been with someone else. I have learned a lot from you and I will always remember what we had. It was a wonderful relationship." I know how hard that may be to do. But you will feel good about yourself if you can handle it in this way. I know it will be hard, but try to be civil when separating the household items. Remember they are only things, don't fight over material things. Try to negotiate for what's most important to you and let other things go. Remember your dignity. You can do it. Good luck and let us know how things go.

Chief Pascoe said...

What awesome advice. I think we often react too quickly in emotionally challenging times and who could blame us? However, when cooler heads prevail, dignity is more likely to be preserved if we take a moment to just think. Just take a breath, count to ten (or 1000 if necessary) and take your time with your response. I recently received a text message that I completely misunderstood and reacted inappropriately and inaccurately to. Luckily, the person I responded to was much cooler than I was and graciously accepted my apology. I suspect she knew I was quiet sincere!!!